Patriotic Viral News
The New York Times and Washington Post Called the Guy Who Chanted “Death to America” for 37 Years “Avuncular”

The New York Times has published what may be the most embarrassing headline in its long and storied history of embarrassing headlines. When Ali Khamenei — the Supreme Leader of Iran, state sponsor of terrorism, and the man personally responsible for the deaths of hundreds of American soldiers — was killed in a joint U.S.-Israeli operation, the paper of record swung into action with this gem: "Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, Hard-Line Cleric Who Made Iran a Regional Power, Is Dead at 86." "Hard-line cleric." The man who ordered 30,000 of his own people shot in the streets for protesting his radical ...Continue reading
The Ladies of The View Have Discovered a New Therapy — and It’s Exactly What You’d Expect

The ladies of *The View* found a cure for their Trump Derangement Syndrome last week, and it involves screaming at the top of their lungs on live television while 2.46 million viewers watch from home and quietly consider canceling cable. Actress Maggie Gyllenhaal stopped by to promote her new feminist Frankenstein remake, shared a little stress-relief exercise her co-star Christian Bale invented while wearing monster prosthetics for weeks, and within about ninety seconds Ana Navarro was shrieking about the President of the United States like a car alarm with a gender studies degree. These women need help. Professional help. Here's ...Continue reading
The Federal Government Has Been Cutting Unemployment Checks to Infants, Time-Travelers, and the Walking Dead

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/tAdLsuBmob0?feature=share DOGE just announced that the Department of Labor handed out $382 million in fraudulent unemployment payments to people who are either under 5 years old, over 115 years old, or — and we want to make sure you're sitting down for this one — not yet born. One lucky claimant listed their birthday as 2154 and collected $41,000 in benefits. Your tax dollars, hard at work funding unemployment insurance for people who won't exist for another 130 years. Elon Musk said he had to read the findings "several times before it sank in." Completely understandable. Most of us had ...Continue reading
The SBA Was Handing Out Six-Figure Business Loans to Babies — Literally

The Small Business Administration gave out $312 million in COVID loans to children age 11 and younger, including a 9-month-old infant who apparently convinced federal bureaucrats he was ready to take his startup to the next level. DOGE uncovered 5,593 loans — every single one of them filed with a Social Security number that didn't match the name on the application — because of course they were. Not one. Not a handful. All 5,593. Let's get the obvious question out of the way: who on earth approved a $100,000 business loan for a baby who wasn't even walking yet? What ...Continue reading
Texas Democrats Found Their Messiah — A Socialist Seminarian Who Thinks God Is Non-Binary

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VN9a-in5wQ Texas Democrats have finally found their savior, and he's literally a seminarian. James Talarico, a 36-year-old Harvard-educated Presbyterian seminary student and state representative, just won the Democratic primary for U.S. Senate in Texas. His plan to end a 37-year Democratic losing streak is straightforward: explain to Texans that Jesus was a radical feminist socialist who would have enthusiastically voted for the Green New Deal. You genuinely cannot make this stuff up. Talarico shot to national fame when he showed up at a Texas House committee hearing to inform everyone that modern science "obviously recognizes that there are many more ...Continue reading
Clinton-Epstein Videos Drop — Bill and Hillary Finally Had to Answer for Jeffrey Under Oath

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiIcOTiqap8 After six months of dodging, ducking, delaying, and defying congressional subpoenas like a pair of career criminals who forgot that Congress can actually hold people in contempt, Bill and Hillary Clinton sat down for filmed depositions about their relationship with convicted child sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein. The House Oversight Committee released the videos on March 2, 2026 — and the same media establishment that spent years calling all of this a "conspiracy theory" is now covering it with a completely straight face. You love to see it. Republicans and Democrats on the Federal Law Enforcement Subcommittee voted unanimously back ...Continue reading
Joe Biden Just Told a Room Full of Black Mourners He’s Smarter Than They Are — at a Funeral

Joe Biden shuffled up to the podium at Jesse Jackson's funeral last Friday and delivered what may be the single most self-unaware speech in the history of American eulogies. The man who couldn't locate a complete sentence for four years, who had to be helped off stages, who dropped out of a presidential race after getting demolished by a teleprompter, stood in a Chicago church and informed the grieving crowd that he is "a hell of a lot smarter than most of you." At a funeral. For someone else. To be fair, Biden did try to explain himself. He was ...Continue reading
